Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
