why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
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