great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
