it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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