VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
