cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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