i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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