real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
