If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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