Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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