You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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