This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
