Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize