I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
