Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
