Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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