What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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