dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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