party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
