so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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