I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize