I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
id be glad to
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
His hands were made for my vagina.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
