They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
