Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
