the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It's official drugs can't kill me
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
