i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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