And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Randomize