About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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