all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
