She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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