More tranny stories later!
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
