I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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