so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize