i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I could fuck to npr.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
