So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
