i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Randomize