Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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