Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I smell stomach acid.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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