I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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