Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
