remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
