I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
