I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I love you. Go after that dick
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
