Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
