vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
