I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
