Me. At least after what I've been through.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
