He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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