why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
