If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
